Up until now, the posts I write have been topics I thought people would find interesting and, hopefully, help some of them along their fitness journey. But what I am realizing, lately, is that while these articles may do just that (be interesting and helpful…) they don’t give you any idea about who I am, my progress and what this fitness journey is like for me.
So I’ve decided to change it up a bit… talk more about my experiences, past and current progress, a-ha moments. (I’m far from perfect or where I want to be). All with the hope that it will help at least one person out there with what they’re struggling with throughout their own fitness journey.
My initial plan, with this post, was to give an update of where I currently am in my journey back to fit, my life, current state, an introduction of sorts… But, then, I realized something important today that I thought might be helpful to share. And, so, and introduction may have to wait. Or you’ll just figure it out as we go along… haha
It’s full blown summer time here in Colorado. And, like, any normal summer day… I took my son to the pool to play with his friends and hang with some moms. Typically, going to the pool is a huge source of discomfort for me. I have never felt comfortable in a bathing suit (whether I look ok or not, doesn’t matter) It’s why I’ve never been to a water park (seriously, never), why I’ve never floated down a river, or enjoyed hanging out on the beach… basically any super cool water sport that everyone else loves (and I secretly would too, if I could relax). But, it’s so fun for the kids, so off we go…
So, today, I found myself among several other moms… each one skinny, flat abs and in a bikini. Ugh. But, wait… it gets better. At first, I felt a little uncomfortable as the only one with a tank top over my suit and boy shorts over bikini bottoms. Here’s the good part… I was criticizing myself for not having a perfect body, not being skinny enough to sport a bikini. However, what I decided to focus on, instead, was how far I have come. Last year, I wouldn’t even wear those boy shorts, because they looked so terrible. Today was a last minute plan to join our friends at the pool. So, I was a little worried, as I ran upstairs to change for the pool, whether I could find anything that would fit at all! But, I have been working very hard for the last couple of months, diligently counting my macros, training 4-5 days a week, increasing the intensity… and was really happy to find that most of my suit options didn’t look that bad! 😉
Moral of the story… even though my body is not the perfect specimen (YET) that I want it to be, it IS getting better. I am getting smaller, things are getting tighter, my shape is coming back. Every day I have to fight the underlying belief that my worth is equal to what I look like on the outside. This is TRUE progress. Progress over perfection. Today, I chose to feel good in my suit and to know that I am working hard toward my goals every day. And, just because everyone may not be able to see that, or realize that, today… I know it, and that’s all that matters.